It Looked The Same!

Earlier tonight, my dad dropped me at sainsburys to do some shopping while he parked up and waited outside somewhere.

So i finished my buying, came outside, had a glance around for the car, saw it up this dark road across the road, and made my way there. The engine was already on.

So i opened the back door, threw my shopping bags on the back seats, and I'm about to shut the door (so i can get in front seat) when i hear a confused sounding "ERR... SORRY..."

So i bent down and glanced inside to the driver seat and see some big African dude sitting there!

So i apologised and told him my car is the same one and walked off. He found it funny though and made some joke about swapping cars or some shit, while i walked ahead and found dads car about 10 cars ahead.

He looked a lot like Guy Goma!!

Looking into the past....

You know how all the stars we see in the sky are really an image of the past? What if someone was watching us, say, 60 light years away... they could see World War 2 unfolding right before their eyes. Or thousands of light years away to see the Egyptian pyramids being built. Or hundreds of millions of light years away to see the dinosaurs walk the earth. Or billions of light years away... "Ah. No intelligent life there. Next!"

I dunno if worm holes actually exist, but if they do, and we could use them, could we go back and view anything in history? Or go far enough to catch up with the first piece of light, and view the big bang? Or travel away from earth at the speed of light (if it was possible) so the earth will appear stuck in time?

Best chat-up line ever

So me and my mate were down the local pub the other day and closing time was near. It was almost empty and the young bar lady was wiping down all the tables while telling the remaining few that they're about to close up now.

But this one drunk dude, slurring and not even walking straight, thought he's in with a chance! The night's almost over, one last go to pull!

As young-bar-lady lets him know they're closing soon, he starts some some small-talk culminating with the magic line in his irresistible drunk cockney accent...

"YERR WANA GO FORRA FRUUCCKINN DRENKKK?!?"



Yeah. That's gonna sweep her off her feet that is.

Yuck Uncle

My 2 yr old nephew (Rishi) is at that stage where he's remembering everything he hears. And when one of our uncles left our house the other day, an uncle who has extremely poor hygiene, one who smells awful, i told nephew that's smelly uncle.

And now hes calling him "yuck mama" (mama=maternal uncle) and "smelly". He's gonna end up saying it in front of him one day.

I only said it once and now its permanent for him!!!!

*will choose his words very carefully now*

*will teach him to say Sir Naresh*